Makeup is all about elevating your look.

When your looks are at your absolute best, you feel more confident. The very word makeup has feminine connotations that most men are reluctant to try out makeup or admit that they wear any.

But the men’s makeup market is booming, with more men taking to wearing some form of makeup.

Well, men experience the same skin problems like dark circles, skin blemishes, dark heads, trouble spots, wrinkles, and more. Using makeup will cover up these problem areas, so why shouldn’t men use makeup!

Whatever Maybelline ads may say, men shun the idea of applying makeup. Or at least, talking about it casually. Only when men’s makeup is normalized (as it very well should be) can restrictive gender norms be broken. And men may be able to express themselves without the fear of being shamed or looked down upon.

When it comes to men’s makeup, a no-makeup-makeup look is ideal. Not that you have to stick to it, of course. Covering those baggy eyes, chapped lips, and dry skin with makeup to lend the appearance of a smooth complexion and even-toned skin is fantastic.

Should men use makeup?

Applying makeup will make you look your absolute best, particularly if a big meeting or an important social occasion arises. 

• Makeup lends a more polished look to your overall appearance.
• To make a great first impression.
• Makeup builds confidence and helps you carry yourself better.
• Using makeup, you learn to take care of your skin better.

Think of this scenario. You have an all-important meeting coming up, and you wake up the next day wanting to look dapper.

But you wake up with baggy eyes that look quite unappealing. Or, a pimple appears out of nowhere just when you are about to go out on an all-important date. Wearing makeup can hide these blemishes and lift your natural look.

We all have features we are not all that fond of. A good bronzer, highlighter, or foundation can help you diminish your worst features and bring out your best features.

Wrinkles, fine lines, and sagging skin are only all too common as you age. Wearing makeup is one aspect of self-care for your skin to appear younger and good-looking.

So, to answer, should men wear makeup?

It is all about an individual’s choice and preference. Guys, you are under no obligation to wear makeup. But you can if you desire it and want to. The choice, as they say, is yours!

Why is it ok for men to wear makeup?

Absolutely yes! Dear men, using makeup doesn’t make you feminine (or gay for that matter!).

Makeup on men was initially considered taboo and weird, but that perception is changing. Makeup in men is becoming more prominent in popular culture. Many celebrities sport some makeup before an important interview, red carpet events, or in their movies.

It is not like makeup in men is a new phenomenon. The ancient Egyptian men sported makeup.

They were particularly fond of smokey eyes. Greeks, Romans, Celts, and many other ancient civilizations were known to paint their faces and eyes and use colored creams. Over the last several years, men’s beauty tide is metamorphosing again.

Every man you see on television, in advertisements, etc., who has to look presentable or likable is wearing makeup.

It includes wearing concealers, color correction, contouring, foundation eyeshadow primer, and even eyeshadow, blush, or lipstick. But this may not be so obvious. Of course, the more obvious ones, eyeliner or blush may not be used by many. But the rest? Certainly!

Skincare influencers, makeup artists, celebrities, besides others, have contributed to normalizing the idea of men wearing makeup without questions of masculinity of the makeup wearers arising.

Then Gen Z is more progressive and open-minded, and they believe that painting their faces or using makeup doesn’t make them any less manly. 

Wearing makeup is a confident booster. It can not only correct an issue or enhance features in your face ― but also promote overall awareness of taking care of your skin at any stage of life and whatever your lifestyle.

So, if it makes you feel more confident, you feel better and more attractive, then go ahead and wear makeup! It is alright to do so, but again, it comes down to individual choice, preference, style, and desire.

For men, a no-makeup-makeup look is ideal. There are several products that men can use to get started with makeup should they want to.

5 Types of makeup that men could use

You don’t need an entire kit for achieving the subtle man makeup. These are five cosmetics to get that subtle and no-frills-makeup for men.

Foundation

As is evident from its name, a foundation is a product that takes all the load off your makeup routine. It acts as the base and is ideal for an evening out and smoothening your complexion, masking blemishes and imperfections, and will make you look youthful and in the prime of life.

Foundations come in liquid, cream, or powder form. You could opt for the liquid form in a shade that matches your skin tone.

Because it doesn’t require a brush to apply, you have a little more control of the quantity you may want to use, and it’s less messy. Unsure of your skin tone? Test the foundation at the back of your hand.

Also, you may want to use a primer as a base layer before applying the foundation. A primer will thoroughly smooth out your face and save you from having to touch up your foundation later on.

Concealer

Interested in makeup, but new to it all and unsure of where to get started? Then the concealer is a great place to start. 

A concealer is a corrector; you may want to cover a blemish, lighten a mole, hide your visibly aging signs, etc. Have an important presentation the next day, but you were up all night preparing for it only to be rewarded with dark circles the following day?

A sudden breakout just before that date you were looking forward to for ages? A concealer will be of great help in these scenarios.

This product is similar to a foundation, but it is thicker and comes in a stick or liquid wand form. A stick means less mess. When choosing a concealer, you must select one that blends with the color of your skin. Initially, as you are still getting the hang of it, get a concealer that doesn’t require a brush. 

So how does this work?

Just dab a little when needed to blend imperfections into the skin surrounding. Apply under the eye, where you have a spot or scar, and then watch as this magical concoction makes your ungainly dark circles, red blemishes, breakouts, or scar disappear magically!

A vital tip to keep in mind: Concealers should not be more than a shade lighter than your actual skin color if you want a more natural look/effect. Moreover, if you are prone to blue or purple under-eye circles, opt for a concealer shade with warm peach undertones for the best results.

Brow filler and brow gel

Everyone’s eyebrows are unique. Most men may not be too fond of the ideal of tinkering with their eyebrows or adding some shape and definition, or even thickness can lend a well-groomed look to enhance your overall appearance.

Not only do brow fillers help you to achieve instantly thicker and denser eyebrows, but they can also be used to fill in your hairline (if it is receding some in a specific spot or you have a few grays that need a little work) and beard.

Men’s eyebrows are fuller, and in most cases, trimming rather than thickening them is the need of the hour.

After all, well-maintained eyebrows make your eyes look that much more attractive. Brow gel, brow fixers, or brow definers all refer to the same thing – a tool when sparingly used keeps those unruly, wild, and untamed arches in check.

Lip Balm

Chappy, dry lips are always a big turn off. Lips are one part of your body that is most prone to damage. A lip balm is a great product to take good care of your lips. Lip balms that keep your smackers smooth and hydrated for hours while being transparent and non-shiny are perfect for men.

The best you can do is choose a lip balm with a matte or satin finish instead of gloss. It will nourish your lips for a natural, moisturized, and smooth look.

Gloss may make your lips shine and make it apparent that you have something on your lips. It is not something that many guys will be comfortable with.

You can also apply some lip balm overnight and then again in the morning when you head out. It will help to keep your lips hydrated and crack-free for the entire day.

You could apply some lip balm overnight and then again in the morning before you head out. It will help to keep your lips crack-free, smooth, and perfectly hydrated all day long.

Bronzer

Powders will look like you have makeup on, but the bronzing gel will give you a delightfully translucent natural tan. Who can resist achieving that wonderfully sun-kissed and naturally-tanned look!?

Gel bronzers will help you achieve precisely that.

Dab some on, and you will look freshly tanned as if you have borrowed a few minutes in the sun. Look for bronzer gels that will lend a matte look without giving off a shimmery, orangey appearance.

How can you tell if a guy is wearing makeup?

With more men, and even women opting for barely noticeable makeup, there are few fail-proof ways to identify if they are wearing makeup or not.

• If their eyebrows were blocky or unruly before, but now they are all prim and perfect.
• If their lips are a little too shiny or glossy, then he’s wearing some gloss.
• You can tell if a guy has got his beard filled by taking a closer look. You will notice a black, gray tint under the actual hair of his beard.
• If someone has contoured their face by looking out for any patches or streaks of different or darker colored skin under the cheeks and jawline.
• Creased white lines on the eyelids is a dead giveaway that the guy is wearing some concealer.
• Suppose a guy has a natural brown skin tone with a pink glow. Highly suspicious!
• If the foundation is not evenly applied, it is easy enough to spot, especially if they haven’t paid attention to the neck area!

Final Thoughts

In this article, we have debunked the common misconception that makeup is for women only and that wearing makeup makes a man more feminine. Beauty and ergo makeup has no gender.

While women’s makeup is oriented towards appearance and skincare routines, men’s makeup leans towards finding a solution for their problems, like receding hairline, dark circles, blemishes, a breakout, etc.

There is no doubt that makeup ups your confidence level and gives you more youthful, healthy, and fresher-looking skin. Want to adorn makeup? Own it and embrace it with confidence!

If you read our post on Hair Care Essentials For Men, you’ll know that we’re all about giving you good, honest advice on products that are tried, tested and that work. In this post, we’ll be doing exactly the same, but this time, we’re looking at the 10 best organic skincare products every man should have in his life.

Dry skin? No problem. Need oily skin care options for men? No worries. Only interested in natural and organic skincare products.  Groom+Style have you covered.

Whatever your skin type, we’ve picked our favorite products to help you restore your skin to great health, and keep it that way.

Essential Exfoliating Washes for Men

Choosing the right exfoliator is important, since you don’t want to scrub off any healthy skin, and plastic beads are always a no-no (plastic beads are very bad for the environment). Stick with these picks and it’ll be smooth sailing.

1. Rugged and Dapper Organic Scrub

This scrub is certified organic and made with all-natural ingredients, making it suitable for use on both the body and face. It is also ideal for all skin types.

2. Thera Tree Tea Tree Oil Exfoliating Scrub

This exfoliating scrub is perfect for those who love the feeling of a freshly exfoliated face. Made with all-natural ingredients, including tea tree oil and natural pumice, it gently removes dead skin cells for a smooth and invigorated complexion.

3. Charcoal Body Scrub

Made with Dead Sea mineral salts and highest quality charcoal, this high-end, affordable scrub is great for infrequent use, and can help to remove dulling impurities from your skin.

Essential Body Washes for Men

The skin on your face is different compared to the skin on the rest of your boy. You need to treat them both well, but when it comes to smelling body washes, you can afford to use something with a little more power.

4. Puracy Sulfate-Free Daily Cleanser

With a delicate citrus and sea salt scent, this is one of our favorite body washes. It’s sulfate-free, and feels great against your skin. Zero harsh chemicals here.

5. Hose Off Antibacterial Natural Body Wash

One of the main reasons we love this one, is because it’s safe for use in rivers and streams. Made with natural essential oils and no nasty chemicals, Hose Off is great for camping and home use.

6. Burt’s Bees Natural Body Wash

Lovely woodsy smell and made with coconut oil, Burt’s Bees body wash is an awesome daily cleanser that’ll leave your skin looking and feeling better than ever. It’s one of our favorites.

Essential Moisturizers for Men

Moisturizers can’t fix unhealthy skin, but they can support skin that’s well-maintained. A good moisturizer should help the healing process and do a great job of locking in moisture. These are our favorite moisturizers for men.

7. Advanced Clinicals Coconut Oil Moisturizer

Just like for your hair, coconut oil is one of the best natural remedies for dry skin. This gentle, soothing moisturizer can be used every day, after taking a shower.

8. Concept Skin Oil-Free Moisturizer

Oily skin is not moisturized skin. This awesome moisturizer helps to balance your skin and prevent excess oil build-up.

9. Radha Beauty Retinol Moisturizer

Popular with the ladies, Radha is just as effective on generally drier male skin. It’s a little pricey, but if you have very dry skin, this stuff is guaranteed to work wonders.

10. Aveeno Daily Moisturizing Cream

Simple, effective, Aveeno is meant to be used every day, and can help to keep your skin in top condition. The secret to Aveeno is a type of oatmeal blend which helps to draw up and lock in moisture to your skin.

Most Frequently Asked Questions

It’s important to note that the effectiveness of a product depends on the ingredients and the formulation, not only the nature of the product. Some natural ingredients are known to have beneficial effects on the skin, such as aloe vera, tea tree oil, and chamomile. However, it’s crucial to read the labels and make sure that the product contains enough of these ingredients to be effective. It’s also important to consider the other ingredients in the product, as some natural ingredients can cause allergic reactions or irritation.

Additionally, natural products may take longer to see results as they work in harmony with the skin and not against it. It’s important to be patient and consistent in using these products to see the best results.

Overall, it’s important to do your own research, read labels, and test the products to find the ones that work best for you.

• Vitamin C: This powerful antioxidant serves as a key ingredient in many skincare products, including dark spot correctors. Its remarkable ability to brighten the skin and diminish the appearance of dark spots has made it a popular choice for those seeking to achieve a more even complexion. Additionally, Vitamin C plays a pivotal role in boosting collagen production, further contributing to the overall health and youthful radiance of the skin.
• Vitamin E: This is another antioxidant that can help to protect the skin from environmental stressors and reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles.
• Hyaluronic acid: This is a natural substance that can help to hydrate the skin and plump up fine lines and wrinkles.
• Natural exfoliants: these are gentle exfoliants that can help to remove dead skin cells and unclog pores, such as natural pumice, bamboo powder, and oatmeal.

It’s important to keep in mind that natural ingredients are not always better, and it’s important to read the labels to make sure that the product is truly natural and not just labeled as such, and also to check for any known allergen or irritant for you. It’s also important to do a patch test before using the product to ensure that your skin does not have any negative reactions.

Conclusion

For more on hair care and styling from Groom+Style, visit our Art of Skin Care section. If your particularly interested in living a more natural lifestyle, you’ll want to read our great article on green cleaning.

Graduating from college, while a great achievement and cause for celebration, can put many young adults in a difficult position.

Expectations are high for landing the right entry-level position, while for many the threat of student debt and rent create a feeling of financial instability.

This guide is here to help you figure out what you need to know to get on your feet and keep moving, as your academic development turns into professional development.

Young Professionals in the Workforce

The college grads joining the workforce are a combination of younger Generation Y (aka “Millennials”) or the oldest members of Generation Z.

Generation Y is the largest generation in the US workforce right now, and 62 percent of them are already in management positions.

As an individual, you might identify with the term technological native. Your generation is prized among the workforce for its communication skills and technological adaptability.

Young Professional Management Styles

According to general trends, young professional managers often like to coach employees through things rather than issuing commands.

This can allow for greater communication and feedback throughout the workplace.

New generations also prefer more adaptable and customizable experiences, such as personalized workspaces, workflows, and even methods.

Much of this is to a company’s benefit, since emerging technologies, competition, public representation, and social images force many companies to think on their feet when facing crucial decisions.

There is also a greater emphasis on transparency and access.

New generation employees frequently don’t appreciate being held on a need-to-know status. They want to be actively engaged, and when kept in the dark about certain decisions, many young professionals will use their technology and communication skills to sleuth it out anyway.

New Generation Lifestyle Preferences

Many, though not all, young professionals tend to be socially liberal. They work to be open-minded, and they are very aware of identity politics and prefer to remain without labels or generational identifiers.

Young professionals are both highly aware of the power of trends.

This means they work harder to understand people as individuals. College grads have had plenty of nurture versus nature debates in their college years, and due to such cultural and interpersonal examination, young professionals inherently excel in career skills like personal branding.

The lifestyle ideal is sometimes characterized by balance. This means a lot of attention is paid to personal health and hygiene, including dieting and exercise. Many young professionals will link their healthy physical choices to developing a healthy mind and intellectual balance as well.

Challenges for New Generations in the Workforce

One of the challenges that newer generations face, as they move forward with their lives and mingle with other generations in the workplace, is that they will often have different priorities from the generations before them.

One theory chalks this up to the young professionals’ access to technology and alternate forms of media that allows you to develop and embrace divergent paths. This means that you or your peers might not be interested in traditional status symbols like property, marriage, and even family-making.

Young professionals are not only distrustful of markets, due to experiencing the Great Recession during formative years, but they are also a generation that tries to keep its ear to the ground and is growing increasingly distrustful of the future due to environmental instability.

These concerns may heavily influence life priorities, including the big priorities of past generations which often included buying a house and making a family.

Among their challenges in the workplace, young professionals positively crave work-life balance.

Finding such a balance can be a major difficulty for them since workplace technologies and their own technological skills often keep them constantly connected even when they aren’t working.

Sometimes the transition from college, especially the liberal arts environment, to the workforce can be jarring simply in the kinds of interaction you will have with coworkers and other employees.

Many college campuses foster the sense of overarching camaraderie throughout the student populace that makes it easier to make friends.

On the other hand, coworker friends might seem to come less easily and might possibly bond less deeply then college friends.

Some company cultures even frown on close friendships between coworkers, for better or worse.

If there’s someone in your office that you think you could really hit it off with, wait for the company happy hour or talk to them on your own time, rather than trying to get to know them in the workplace.

This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t be friendly with your coworkers. You will be spending eight or more hours with them a day, in most cases, so treating them with kindness and respect are nonetheless important for good coworker relationships.

Similarly, the college experience often prides itself on being an open forum for students to develop their mind by voicing ideas and opinions.

While most workplaces value input and would likely benefit from ideas and suggestions, many workplaces will provide a time and a place for sharing these suggestions. So it’s best to think them through fully and then submit them through the proper avenues, rather than interrupting someone’s lunch to chat about them.

What Are Your Goals in Life?

Why Set Goals?

Transitioning out of college is a great time to set goals for your life.

The next few years will feel like they pass quickly, and it’s easy to be caught feeling unprepared or even unfulfilled after your first few years out of college. This is especially prevalent when you haven’t made steps toward your larger life goals. Setting these goals and thinking about what you want is a necessary step toward making them happen.

Planning is invaluable for helping you know what you want.

You may have things that you want for your life or that will give great personal meaning. There are many things you may not realize that you want until you start thinking about them. And goals like learning a new skill, such as speaking a new language, learning photography, or even experiences, such as hiking the Appalachian trail, will take time, dedication, and practice.

Most of the goals that we really want in life aren’t automatic. They take planning, time, and effort. But learning to plan makes it much more likely that these goals could be accomplished.

How to Begin Goal-Setting

While some people have burning goals inside of them, other might have to dig a little bit to figure out what they want. This can be done with brainstorming. A common brainstorm, often used in financial planning, is to think about your life in terms of year increments.

What kind of lifestyle do you see yourself living in five years? What do you need to do to get there? Ten years down the line? And twenty?

You might also take a more freeform approach asking yourself, what’s important to you? What are you pondering and thinking about lately? Just relax and set down everything that comes to mind.

When it comes to actually setting your goals, you’ll want to narrow this down to the most important factors. Then you can start working on goal plans. It’s usually best to work on your goals one at a time. Too many changes in your life all at once can throw you off your progress, be too difficult, and cause you to revert.

Now take this with a grain of salt, because what we’re really telling you is how important it is to prioritize your time. If one of your goals is a long-term goal that you plan to chip away at weekly, such as a savings goal, then you will most likely have the capacity to take on other goals, such as a skills goal. There are also feasible combination goals, such as weight-loss or muscle-training goals that require both dieting and exercising.

These are two different goals that you’ll pursue at once, as they go hand-in-hand toward the overall purpose.

This single goal rule helps you to avoid burnout.

Many people experience that learning new skills or hobbies take a lot more dedication outside of school.

No one will be grading you or holding your accountable for doing these things but your own will and determination. Your career might also get in the way as it starts to take a massive chunk of your time.

For this reason, if you’re starting a big project, such as a new skill, it’s best to pick one and stick with it until it becomes easier and takes less time and effort.

Keep in mind that your goals are for you.

Many of your peers, friends, and coworkers will have different goals and views.

For instance, you might know that you want to purchase a home someday but many of your friends are more interested in the long-term mobility of renting. Or you might be saving your money for long stints of overseas travel while your peers are able to spend more money on other things.

The spending habits and abilities of others should not influence your individual goals.

Steps to Setting Goals

1.  Make Sure Your Goals are Realistic and Possible

You need to begin by believing that your goals can be accomplished. It will be even more difficult to accomplish something that you don’t think will ever really happen.

2. Write Down your Goals and Keep Them Nearby

Write down your goal. This will allow you to create something with your goal. Goals that aren’t written down are more likely to be forgotten. Put it somewhere that you can see it. For this reason, many people create an inspiration wall or cork board of things that remind them of their goals and motivation.

Have a purpose. Your purpose will remind you of why goals are important. Perhaps your goal is a stepping stone to being able to affect bigger changes in the world or in your own life. Having a purpose will affect your determination to achieve your goals.

3. Make a Plan and Keep Track of Progress

Break it down into a plan. What are the steps needed? You may not know all the steps you need to take but that’s okay, you just need to know the first few steps ahead of you. The rest of the path will clarify as you take it. Actionable steps need to happen for you to get going.

4. Don’t Procrastinate

Do it now. Some of our greatest productive time is spend stalling, overthinking, and wondering whether we’re unqualified or good enough. Not only is this stalling faze hard on us emotionally, but it takes away from the time that you could be using to improve your skills and make headway toward your goals.

Stalling takes many forms and is easy to justify to ourselves. Sometimes it means watching video after video or reading informational articles without taking meaningful action. We will always find ways of justifying procrastination to ourselves when we stall. The best thing we can do for ourselves, however, is to start.

5. Find Ways to Hold Yourself Accountable

Seek support and hold yourself accountable. Working toward our goals can be tough. It’s helpful to have friends and mentors who can hold us accountable. Support groups, entrepreneurial groups, and even tracking with your own journal or planner can help to keep your momentum up.

Tips for Setting Goals

• Be positive with your goals. We all have goals that we know to be long shots. But if you are going to actually work toward them, you need to believe that these goals are accomplishable.
• Make your actionable steps so precise that you can mark it on a calendar.
• If you have multiple goals, make sure you know which ones top your priorities.
• Start a journal to mark down your goal progress.
• Set your own realistic goals and have confidence in them. It’s common when you tell someone that you’re starting a project, including friends, family, and employers, that they show support and enthusiasm by raising the stakes of the goal.
• You might tell someone that you’re writing a book and they will express their confidence in you by saying something like they’re sure it’s going to be a bestseller. This could make you feel as if they’ve co-opted the goal and transformed much less realistic write a bestseller.
• Keep in mind that these are your goals and it’s up to you to set the realistic parameters that you need for your own best performance.
• Learn from your process. If you notice something as you work toward your goal that would alter how you would approach your next goal.
• Challenge yourself. If you finish a goal too easily make the next one harder.

What Are SMART Goals?

Smart goals refer to goals that are specific, measurable, attainable, relevant and time-bound.

When brainstorming your SMART goals, you can pick the categories that are important to you and then select goals for each category.

Common categories include:

• Career
• Financial
• Education
• Family
• Artistic
• Attitude
• Physical
• Pleasure
• Public service

Making SMART goals can help you to finetune the things you want to achieve into actions that you can take in the time you have.

A SMART goal is the difference between writing down that you “want to bike across the country,” and adding a time-bound parameter by saying you “want to bike across the country in the Spring of 2020.”

This time-bound component is especially relevant for financial goals. For instance, knowing that you want to buy a home in 2022 tells you how much money you need to be able to put away monthly to meet that downpayment goal.

How Much Do You Spend Now?

Starting a healthy budget begins with knowing your typical expenditures. While you have a feel for how much you spend every month, it’s helpful to use a calculator like this one while budgeting.

• Household Bills, e.g. rent, electricity, natural gas, water, sewage, trash collection
• Living costs, e.g. daily spending habits
• Financial products, e.g. insurance
• Family and friends, e.g. presents
• Travel, e.g. car costs and maintenance costs, gas, public transport
• Food and Dining, e.g. bar and restaurant costs
• Grocery, e.g. food materials that you purchase to prepare yourself
• Leisure, e.g. holidays, sports
• Hygiene products, e.g. soap, wash, makeup, and cosmetics

Putting your expenditures in different categories can help you examine your spending habits, and decide whether it’s all necessary.

How to Set Up a Budget

If one of your goals is the learn how to budget your money and become more financially responsible, you’re not alone. Budgeting in its most basic form helps you to manage your money. It gets a bad rap, similar to dieting, for being restrictive of for forcing you to stop enjoying yourself.

This isn’t always the case, however, as budgeting has numerous life-enhancing benefits. Like goals, your budget helps you plan for the future. For one, it allows you to feel that you have control over your money and your spending. It also keeps you focused on your money goals, which can make you feel trapped or overwhelmed without a plan.

Budgeting has many benefits and is recommended for everyone who manages their own finances. It can give you a peace of mind and grasp on the cost of your day to day spending.

Budgeting gives you the padding and security to deal with unexpected costs. Having an updated budget gives you the right information to help you with long-term and short-term decision-making. Your budget will also allow you to spot and solve big problems in advance.

The more comfortable you are with budgeting, the easier it will be to communicate about money and problem-solve with partners and loved ones. This can help you to get a grasp on your debt load and think of whether you can take on more, such as a car loan or mortgage.

Build an Emergency Fund

Your emergency fund is a savings account that you don’t use unless you find yourself in the midst of a big financial emergency or something goes afoul with your employment. Your first saving project should be working to establish your emergency fund.

If you look above where you laid out how much money you spend each month, many advisors will recommend an emergency fund that can get you through three months of normal expenditures. Once you have that set aside in an accessible savings account, you can start saving toward your other financial goals.

Budgeting Strategies

The Envelope System

If you have difficulties with overspending throughout the month, try out the envelope system. Keep your weekly allowance of cash in an envelope with you. Spend only cash or if you make a purchase online with credit remove the cash and put it in a separate envelope. When you spend all the money in the envelope, you have used your weekly budget.

Automatic Savings Deposits

Schedule automatic savings. Automatic savings will transfer a certain amount of money from your checking account to your assigned savings account. This will let you stay on track with your savings goals when you forget to transfer the money yourself.

You can, start small with growing your savings account, then gradually grow the amount that you save, as you become comfortable with budgeting and as you earn more.

What Do Spend Your Money on Now?

One way to start noticing your expenditures is to spend a month collecting receipts or printing receipts from bills and everything you purchase throughout the month into one envelope. This will help you to understand by the end of the month where all your money is going.

Tips On How to Save Money

Eliminate Unnecessary Fees

• Make sure you aren’t paying bank fees for either your checking or savings accounts. Sometimes banks require your account to hold minimum balances or a direct deposit wired into your account. If you are unable to meet the minimums, switch to a new account. There is no reason to pay these fees as there are a number of account tiers available as you get started on your financial journey. While shopping around check out accounts that offer a sign-up bonus to make a little extra.
• Save on energy by installing a smart thermostat, as well as CFL and LEDs. You might also consider outlet timers for your electronic banks to switch off the energy to printers and other home electronics at night.
• Maintenance your possessions, including your car, kitchen appliances, and computer. Furniture maintenance and carpet cleaning could also save your investments and give them a longer lifespan.
• Examine and cancel unused subscriptions, such as gym memberships, cable, phone plans, and wifi usage, as well as club and subscription boxes.
• Keep and eye on services that might be inflating your bills.
• Consolidate your student loans into a low-rate package.
• Use online bill pay to avoid unnecessary late fees.

Embrace Thrifty Lifestyle Choices

• Sell off unwanted items and clutter.
• Make plans to stay in with your friends rather than going out for expensive dinners and drinks.
• Learn to patch clothes and sew and replace buttons, instead of throwing away usable clothing.
• Use a public library for a variety of services and resources, including borrowing books, movies, and magazines, as well as inexpensive public workspaces where you don’t need to purchase a beverage before use.
• Buy used items, such as clothing and dishware.
• Pack your lunch for work, and learn to jazz up your leftovers.
• Learn to DIY simple household fixes.
• Use a deep-freezer or chest-freezer. These spaces allow you to buy food ingredients in bulk and cook in batch, making your own frozen meals for later.
• Go out to free events in town. Keep an eye on festival markets, free markets, free community concerts, and other free activities will help you get out of the house on the cheap.
• Start an indoor or outdoor container garden. This is a great option for someone who loves to cook with herbs and spices but it starting to find it a little expensive.
• Get a friend to cut your hair and do a DIY spa and facial day.
• Try out DIY cleaning supplies, which are both less expensive, and offer reduced health and environmental risks within your home.
• Make your own coffee and beverages.

Control Your Spending

• Avoid impulse purchasing by waiting thirty days to decide on bigger purchases. If, after a month, the urge to buy hasn’t passed, it could be something that you really want.
• Make a shopping list when you go out to buy groceries and household items. Shop at inexpensive stores and save the higher tier stores for purchasing the occasional specialty item.
• When you do make a large purchase, such as a new appliance, make sure that you buy a model that is hardy and built to last.
• When you know online purchases are a problem, remove your credit card number from express checkouts so that you will need to enter it every time.
• Calculate purchases by your hourly income rather than the dollar amount.
• Implement no spend days weekly. These are days that you prepare your own food and don’t online shop.

5 Things You Should Be Doing Immediately After Graduation

1. Decide on Housing

Deciding on housing after college can easily make people feel unsettled or directionless. If you know where you’ll be living, you might have a lot of confidence in your career path. Your housing decision is wrapped up in where you plan on going to make your career, what your job prospects are, and what kind of support you have.

Many young professionals spend a year or so moving back in with parents or relatives after college until they are able to get on their feet. This gives them the opportunity to learn to budget, build savings, and develop a plan without having to pay steep rent prices. While generous and certainly a leg up, many find the lifestyle to be rather restrictive and eventually decide to move out.

Others may not have this option. This is when it’s good to ask yourself whether you’re better off getting a roommate or going it alone. Sharing expenses with a roommate offers considerable financial relief as you get started with your career.

A good roommate can also offer solidarity and a relief from feeling alone if you’re in a new place or new situation. However, a bad roommate situation can exacerbate these issues, possibly causing you to feel more alone, unsupported, or uncomfortable in your living space. Essentially a good roommate can help you through a difficult time, and a bad roommate might make everything feel exponentially worse.

The best way to judge whether or not you need a roommate, besides looking at rent prices and your potential finances, is to think about what you personally need. Are you the sort of person who has a difficult time being alone and finds yourself seeking out friends? Or are you the sort of person who really values your alone time, and looks forward to making your adult home a personal space for yourself? Living alone gives you the benefit of fewer distractions when you’re trying to focus, an environment that reflects your personal preferences, and a space to rest and relax alone.

2. Update Your Wardrobe

Appearances can matter greatly when it comes to how people will treat you in the workforce. Your clothes should fit correctly and be age appropriate. They should also allow you to be comfortable in your own skin. If you dislike the feel of a certain fabric or fit, that discomfort will show an impact others’ perceptions, as well as how you feel throughout your day. Just be sure to get rid of the old as you bring in the new. You may also want to be careful about things such as piercings and tattoos. If you want to add a bit more individuality to your wardrobe, then you should consider some accessories.

Learning to dress for your career doesn’t need to be a matter of buying high-priced outfits. Since every office is a little different, and you may not know exactly what you need until your first week or so. Waiting until you’re on the job to purchase your work wardrobe may make you feel like you’re on a time crunch, but it could save you from expensive, unnecessary purchases in the long run.

Sports shoes and sportswear are usually not acceptable in most office settings. Suits and shoes are noted as the best place to splurge on your work wardrobe since these pieces will last a long time. Items like shirts and pants will stain and undergo more wear and tear, meaning that they will need to be replaced more often. Nevertheless, one staple piece to get you started is a nice pair of pants that aren’t jeans (or designer sweatpants).

Keep It Simple with a Capsule Wardrobe

Capsule wardrobes feature versatile separates in neutral colors that you can mix and match. This wardrobe strategy recommends an investment in a few essential and timeless items that can be supplemented with seasonal pieces. And if you’re interested in even more minimalism than that you might consider a personal uniform for yourself that will help you to look professional every day without having to stress over wardrobe choices and appropriateness.

To get started, go through your wardrobe and figure out what you do have, and then fill in the gaps from there. Buy for versatility, so that everything can be worn multiple ways without having items that only fit with one outfit. This also means learning how to dress minimally so that it’s much easier to mix and match your clothes. You can then use accessories, such as an attractive watch or seasonal scarf, to add a little more character when you want to.

3. Prepare Your Kitchen: Quick and Easy Recipes On the Go

Meal prepping refers to cooking a large batch of quick, combination-style meals that you can put into containers for grab and go lunches. This can help you to save time, and money, in the long run, while allowing you to feel organized when it comes to your lunch hour. Here are a few quick ones to try out:

• Burrito Bowl – Burrito bowls often combine salad, beans, rice, a stir-fry with veggies and meat, and some form of salsa or guacamole into a single container meal. These can be endlessly varied based on different preferences, including the use of different kinds of spices, for example, lime-cilantro one week and south-west chipotle the next, and different ingredients to keep you from growing too burnt out on this all-in-one meal.
• Skewers – Skewers are a very useful grab-and-go option since they do not require you to have silverware or even a normal plate and bowl. Skewers can be put in a bag and eaten with a napkin and possibly a dipping sauce. These can be anything from salad skewers, with cucumbers and cherry tomatoes, to chicken skewered along with grilled or roasted vegetables.
• Egg Cups – Great for breakfast, egg cups are made from using egg to bind together some of your favorite ingredients. Do this by lining and greasing a muffin tin and the ingredients that you want in the mix. This can include potatoes, fried vegetables, onions, tomatoes, and basically anything that you would normally add to a quiche. Then bake these in the oven at around 350 degrees Fahrenheit, until the eggs are completely set.
• Meat, Spinach, or Vegetable Hand Pie – Hand pies take more work in the prep stage; however, many can be made at once and frozen for later. Hand pies can be very nutritious, depending on the filling you choose and easy to eat on the go. Fillings, such as spinach and cheese, or lean sausage and vegetables, can be mixed raw and then cooked in the oven inside the pie crust. You can either put together your own pie crust and roll it out to shape individual pies by placing the filling in the center and sealing the pie crust around it, or you can buy pre-made pie crust from the store.
• Smoothies – Smoothies are quickly made in the blender, often taking just a few minutes to prep the ingredients and toss them in. Smoothies are easily portable in a water bottle and one of the best parts about it is the minimal cleanup after prepping since many blenders can even wash themselves. Common smoothies include frozen and fresh fruit, a caffeine element, such as green tea, fruit juices, and greens, such as kale and spinach.

4. Update Your Social Media and LinkedIn

It’s no secret the employers and recruiters look at social media accounts when vetting applicants for a position. In fact, this survey found that 70 percent of employers are likely to snoop on applicants’ social media profiles as well as googling an applicant. It’s no wonder why they check, since there’s a lot of information that they can get from the way an individual represents themselves on these networks.

When you start prioritizing building your career, we recommend taking a second and thinking over how appropriate your posts are. However, this doesn’t mean that social media only hurts your chances of getting a job. In fact, there are many situations where it can actually help you.

Here are things employers and recruiters want to see on your social accounts:

• They hope to find information that supports your job qualifications. For instance, does your application say that you have great communication skills? Social media is a venue for demonstrating your ability for expression, diplomacy, and engagement in your chosen industry.
• They like to see that you have any professional persona online at all. Some people keep social media sites just for connecting with friends and family. As long as these profiles are good, clean fun, that’s usually just fine. However, to show a more professional side of yourself, you can design a professional domain for yourself or use a well-known work-oriented social networking site like LinkedIn.
• Employers are also looking at what other people are posting about you. If you have a positive standing among your peers and family members, this will be easy to maintain.
• They want to see great communication skills and even a little creativity and personality.

What should you not post?

• 39 percent of employers say that they won’t hire a candidate who posts provocative or inappropriate photos, videos, or information. You don’t have to be the source of this content to be flagged either, so it’s best to be careful of what you share.
• 38 percent of employers have rejected candidates for posting information about drinking or using drugs. So if you do have photos where you are visibly inebriated or partying, you might want to remove those or set more strict privacy standards on them.
• 32 percent have flagged candidates for posting discriminatory content regarding race, gender, or religion.
• Another red flag is complaining about or bad-mouthing a coworker, previous employer, work situation, or coworker.
• 27 percent say they flag you if they find that you’ve lied about your qualifications, or display poor communication skills.
• Avoid being linked to criminal behavior.
• Don’t share confidential information from a previous employer.
• Avoid using unprofessional screen names or handles.
• Lying about absences or sick days can get you fired.
• 17 percent of employers even flag users who post too frequently.

LinkedIn Etiquette

Nevertheless, you need a professional online presence. 57 percent of employers note that they are less likely to call a candidate that has no online presence at all. One of the easiest ways to do this is to connect professionally with LinkedIn.

However, experiences on LinkedIn may feel a little different from your other social networking experiences, since it is a professional network. LinkedIn most often functions with normal professional communications and posting etiquette. It’s a good place to show new skills that you’re working on, and classes that you’re taking toward your professional development. Any content that you post on LinkedIn should be work appropriate and in most cases work-oriented. Similar to office rules, LinkedIn is less of a place to air political views and opinions than it is to connect to individuals within your industry.

5. Network and Visit Events Related to Your Career

Many colleges bring networking events to campus to get you started. You might be familiar with career fairs and even particular events meant to introduce you to aspects of specific careers.

These kinds of events are still around as you transfer to developing your career, though it may require you to seek them out. Networking opportunities take the form of anything from Ignite events to city-wide career fairs, company happy hours, industry happy hours, and even entrepreneurial groups for those considering starting their own projects.

A great way to begin networking is to ask people who are successful in your chosen career path and industry what education measures they took and whether they would recommend it. You can email professionals in your field offering to buy them coffee so that they might meet with you and answer some questions about their career. While many emails will be ignored and many will be too busy, you might find one or two people who are happy to meet with you.

Applications to Help You Succeed in Life

It’s no secret that most young professionals are constantly connected. In some cases, this can be a cause for concern, but it also means having the know-how to use productivity applications to make your life easier, more flexible, and help manage your time. Here are some apps that we think spectacularly help with goals of personal growth and development:

• Forest – Forest is a great way to put down your phone when you need to focus on an activity or task. Once you start a timer on Forest, you begin building a tree. Accessing other applications on your phone will force you to cancel out of the tree. It’s a great way to make yourself think twice before looking at something on your phone.
• Productive Habit Tracker – This application allows you to track daily habits and work towards your goals. The ability to see your daily progress makes a good incentive for you to keep up with your goal plans.
• Evernote – This is a powerful all-in-one cloud notebook app that allows you to clip pieces from the web while also taking notes on all your devices.
• Pocket– When you’re browsing online but don’t have the opportunity to read every interesting article you come across, Pocket allows you to save content to read and look through at a better time.
• TripIt– TripIt helps you organize your travel plans and itineraries so that you can keep everything in one place.

Continuing Education and Advancing Your Career

Further education might be something to keep in mind as you look at your career going forward. One of the best ways to determine whether further education will benefit you is to look at qualification requirements and to speak with professionals in your field.

Professional degrees are required for advancement in many traditional fields, such as medicine and law. Graduate school becomes necessary for most individuals wanting to practice scientific research and development, as well as some technology-based careers. Education careers will require degrees, such as Education degrees, Masters, or Doctoral degrees, as well as additional certifications, depending on your location and educational niche. Some might also consider adding a Business degree to their C.V. to receive management credentials.

If you’re considering further education, it’s crucial to have a mentor who can help you determine your career goals and professional development. In some cases, this mentor is an academic advisor, but many will find mentors who are in their professional field. One way to begin this is to look for individuals who exemplify your goals within your field. Try to find local professionals that you can actively approach and network with, as well as high-profile national and international names in your field.

For those unsure of how they want to develop, entry-level continuing education takes a variety of forms from classes offered from a variety of sources. These include accredited universities and individual organizations, as well as free library lectures and unaffiliated language learning groups.

Keep in mind that many universities offer career counseling services to alumnae for about a year after graduation. Many of these career centers also offer continuing education courses and networking events as well.

Conclusion

We know you have a lot to think about as you transition, but this is also a fun time to take in a lot of experiences and learn for yourself the way that you want to use your time and money. Setting goals and budgeting can set you on the right path for designing a fulfilling and enjoyable professional life for yourself.

Personal development is a lifelong learning process that prioritizes an individual’s ability to assess and improve their own skills to set and achieve long term goals. These goals can influence an individual’s career, finances, health, and personal ambitions.

According to Myrko Thum, personal development can be understood as “the conscious pursuit of personal growth by expanding self-awareness and knowledge and improving personal skills.” 

It’s also an acknowledgment that we don’t stop learning after we leave formal schooling. And even outside of formal education, we can still take control of our own skills and goals.

Whether your personal development goals are simple or complex, the process to reach them is a flexible effort, based on experience without truly right or wrong answers. Your pathway for personal development depends on your goals, how you envision yourself in the future, and your particular learning processes. In some ways, it can be understood simply as taking responsibility for what we know, understand, and are able to accomplish.

For many people, personal development feeds on personal ambition. Such a model centers personal development around growth and skill attainment to break down obstacles, think positively, and accomplish goals. However, this is not the only pathway for personal development. Others choose to develop skills in order to fill needs, such as physical strength and comfort, self-expression, social poise, and community development.

The Benefits of Personal Development

Personal cultivation is a constant throughout history. While it likely stems from psychological drives, such as the hierarchy of needs, individual cases have documented their development journey from ancient times to the present.

One of the main goals of this long-standing tradition of personal development is for individuals to have the inner resources needed to live their best lives.

While the various practices involved in this development process may target individual skills and parts of life, each is key to helping an individual bring about a fulfilling lifestyle in which they believe that what they do has purpose and matters.

There are many benefits to working on personal development, from building on your own talent and potential to realizing your dreams or building a future career:

• Personal development may be a part of psychological self-actualization, helping individuals fulfill their hierarchy of needs, particularly:
  • Self-worth
  • Self-esteem
  • Self-empowerment 
• You can live a happier, more spiritual, or more fulfilling life.
  • Learn to manage your time and energy in a way that allows you to focus more on loved ones.
  • Nurture social relationships and a sense of community and understanding with others. 
• You can live a healthier life by developing good habits and taking care of your body and mind.
  • Maintain daily habits of good food choices, adequate rest, and getting your body moving. 
  • Meditate, pray, or find other ways to find solace. 
• Self-reflection helps you to better understand yourself, your actions, your skills, and your personal relationships.
  • Gain self-awareness by assessing your strengths and weaknesses, as well as what you value and need to live your best life.
  • Explore and learn to tap into your personal motivation by understanding why you are self-developing and what you intend to achieve.
  • Achieve business and career-based goals through learning and productivity.

Spiritual Development

While much of personal development includes skills training, there is wide latitude for spiritual development. This includes the ability to improve self-awareness, introspection, and reflection while developing a stronger relationship with one’s personal and spiritual identity.

For many people, personal development begins right here with self-awareness. Spiritual development might also include finding a way to understand your personal values, beliefs, and the purpose to which you intend to dedicate a large part of your life.

Spiritual development has often taken the form of yoga, martial arts and self-discipline, philosophical study, meditation, spirituality, and even asceticism.

In many cases, spiritual development takes on an ethical and philosophical interest. As you come to understand yourself, you will also need to consider the laws with which you govern your actions, as well as whether they support the goals you set for your life.

We all act according to some ethical leaning. That doesn’t mean that we understand it, that we have examined it, or that it’s even consistent. Spiritual development often means examining these instincts, learnings, and assumptions that may seem like they come naturally.

The more we understand them, the more likely we are to make them more consistent with the type of person that we intend to be. These spiritual and ethical values are important for building a strong foundation for the more intellectual and physical sides of personal development.

Intellectual Development

Mental and intellectual development are two ways of improving your function in the world. Through mental development, you will likely have the training, discipline, and focus to better assess what is happening and how to solve your problems.

At the same time, intellectual development offers you an expansive and wide range of experiences, in addition to your own, to draw upon. This allows us to expand our minds and understandings far beyond what any one of us could know in a lifetime.

You’ve probably heard a lot about how the worlds’ most successful people set aside time to read every day, whether its history, self-help, personal development, or the psychological understanding found in fiction. When we read we are absorbing others’ experiences, and experience is one of the most important ways that we learn and grow.

Mental and intellectual development helps you to stretch the mind while understanding, reflecting, and building on your experiences in a way that allows you to see more of the world around you.

At the same time, this will make you more open to trying your hand at new subjects, undergoing different experiences and learning more as you go. When you keep yourself limited, it can be difficult to branch out. However, when you work to expand mentally and intellectually, it becomes easier to embrace new and different solutions.

Physical Development

Physical pursuits are among the most common forms of personal development for adults. They often take the form of physical fitness but can web into smaller specializations from there, such as yoga, martial arts, weight loss (whether it’s a diet like keto or a routine like intermittent fasting), muscle building, athletic training, and outdoor sports training.

Physical development is not only important for keeping the body fit and healthy, but it also impacts how others see us, our own sense of self-esteem, and it can be a positive emotional outlet for stress and frustration.

Regular exercise doesn’t just enhance our physical fitness, it also has enormous benefits for how your mind works. We can never truly separate the disciplines of the body and the mind. To begin with, the brain is part of the body, wired into the same system of nourishment, health, sleep and waking cycles, and all the other factors that make us tick.

Creative Development

Creative thinking is the root of problem-solving, flexibility, ideation, and mental agility. Creative thinkers always have a way of making what they want to happen and bringing about their visions.

Not only that, but creative skills are among the most desired or most missed out on skills for older adults. It’s a common sentiment for older individuals to feel that they have missed out on creative skills that are often seen as life-enriching, such as musical skills, drawing, visual arts, or writing skills. These creative skills become more important, as we accumulate more experiences throughout our lives and look for ways to express them.

Learning creative skills from the ground up can be difficult for adults, since it may take more effort to pick up a skill, unlearn bad habits, or find the time to practice. Nonetheless, creative skills have a powerful positive force on everyday life and career, offering psychological benefits, feelings of self-worth, avenues for making sense of one’s place in the world, a wider ability for self-reflection, and a sense of creative thinking that you can bring to the table every day.

Relationships and Social Development

Social skills are a key topic in the self-help and personal development discourse. These skills influence everything from one’s ability to gather allies to their causes, form meaningful relationships, participate in a community, interact professionally, and communicate on a wider scale. 

While it may seem that some people have innately stronger social skills than others, social skills are something that can be learned and practiced.

Meaningful social relationships are key to a healthy life for both those who may identify as introverted or antisocial and the social extroverts alike. What form that these meaningful relationships take and the ways in which they are expressed will differ drastically from person to person. Nonetheless, the ability to develop relationships is almost universally indispensable.

One of the biggest things that holds back an individual’s relationships and social development is fear. Fear of rejection and self-consciousness are rampant hindrances to positive social relationships. It can take a willingness to be vulnerable, as well as a self-confidence that comes from knowing one’s individual limitations, to embrace positive social situations and form meaningful relationships.

Where to Begin?

Taking those first steps to work on improving personal development can be overwhelming. Everyone will follow a different path through their development. The way that each individual will go about developing will also be highly subjective, requiring one to look at their own goals, plans, skills, and, in particular, priorities.

Certain industries offer gateways for different people, complementing different tastes and styles. Some people might begin straight away by taking classes and skills training, there’s also the option to hire a life coach, while others will listen to podcasts and read books to get started.

This is all dependent on how you learn and prefer to spend your time. Nonetheless, there are a few main paths to get started with personal development:

• Some people will begin with the more mental side of personal development, such as implementing positive thinking, developing personal organization, and creating routines. In many cases, this mental form of personal development opens many doors, allowing individuals to be more productive with their time, more optimistic about their approach, and more willing to begin new projects and take new opportunities.
• Others will approach personal development from a physical well-being approach, generally beginning with regulating their diet and exercise routines, before moving to other aspects and priorities. With the physical approach, it can be useful to start by working toward an initial goal, such as training for a target weight or to run in a particular race.
• Many will also begin with skills development, particularly as developing new skills may influence their career or passion. A skills development path is wide with all kinds of skills, from picking up a musical instrument, to learning to code, to learning about a new field, or learning a new language.

If you’re not sure where to begin, it can be helpful to have something that you want to achieve. Having a larger goal or project that you want to accomplish will give your personal development structure. This may include directing priorities, choosing which avenues to pursue first, and, in some cases, it can even direct you with a timeline.

Visualize

Personal development requires people to reflect on themselves and visualize where they want to be. This alone can be a difficult and ponderous exercise for many people. Nonetheless, it’s the best way to begin a journey of personal development, ensuring that you spend your time on becoming the kind of person you want to be.

Visualization can take many productive forms. Some people will know exactly what they want to learn or how they want to live. This might mean learning skills such as dressing well, learning to make friends and form communities, or learning a business skill.

Others, however, will need to reflect for some time on what it would look like to become the kind of person they would want to be. Only through this kind of reflection will they be able to set the kinds of goals and priorities that will allow them to enrich their life.

The visualization stage can ask a lot from you though, as you consider questions, such as your station in life, your domestic and career goals, and how your own personality works in the balance. In some ways, it’s similar to asking you what you want to see yourself in five years, what you want your skill sets to be, and even how you want to think.

This might be a lot of self-reflection of the kind that we don’t often delve into during our day-to-day lives. To aid your visualization, consider tools that will help you organize your thoughts. Common tools include pros-and-cons lists, mindmapping, journaling, and questionnaires.

Dissatisfaction and the Need for Change

In many cases, the desire for personal development is a need for change from the way that things currently are. You may find yourself dissatisfied with the way that your life is going, or have the feeling that you are living for someone else’s dreams as opposed to your own.

During times like these, it can be important to ask yourself:

• How it could be better and what would make it better?
• What would you rather be doing?
• If you had nothing barring your way, and all the resources you needed to accomplish your goals, what would your goals look like?

These questions might not be enough to satisfy your dissatisfaction or change your life. Nonetheless, they can help you understand the direction you need from your personal development to live a happier, more fulfilling life.

Consider What You Can Do to Reach the Person You Visualize

When you have a more clear picture of where your goals are heading, you can start asking yourself what you should do, learn, and practice to get there.

It can be helpful in this case to make a list of possibilities, that way you can organize them into solutions, goals, and even timelines. Begin by weighing your priorities. Consider what routines you will need to have, as well as what you will need to learn before you can begin focusing on your goals.

These questions will lead you to find the intermediate steps that lie between you and the person you visualize for yourself.

Look for Reading Material

Look for learning and reading material that will help you to understand the various parts of your goal. There are a number of self-help books geared toward general personal development, such as positive thinking, spiritual discovery, philosophical understanding, and strengthening social relationships.

Nonetheless, once you know what your goals are, you might be better suited by reading material more specific to your field. In most cases, each field or skill that you intend to learn will have it’s own canonical set of educational books. The more you can inform yourself on your chosen field, the easier time you will have working toward mastering skills within that field.

Look for Mentors

At times, it becomes important to consult someone who has gone through the kind of personal development that you intend for yourself. This person can be considered a mentor, and for many people they can offer the indispensable service of humanizing a process.

As much as we love reading to expand our minds, many skills and efficiencies are experiential and hands-on. This means that you really can’t learn everything from a book. Live events and podcasts offer us the semblance of a relationship with a mentor. However, for many people, this limited social interaction isn’t enough.

Finding mentors can help you learn how to solve some of the problems that you’ve been having trouble with. A mentor will help you learn how to think your way through these problems. Answers are temporary. However, the method of thinking that will help you to find answers and solve problems is an indispensable skill.

Set Goals

Goals are a way of structuring and organizing personal development, as opposed to adding something extra to your life. Goals give direction to what you do with your time.

One of the most common mistakes with personal development is using goals to try to make life seem bigger. Goals structure what’s necessary, so adding them in to inflate your daily life will likely just overload you. Instead, it’s important to allow the goals to offer you direction.

Part of goal-setting, therefore, is gaining clarity on what you need to be doing. Once you know your priorities, you can pare down your schedule and eliminate those things that you don’t need. Personal development doesn’t necessarily come from doing more all the time. It’s much more important to do just what you can handle while doing those few things better and better.

If you start small, you will be amazed at what you can accomplish. Big projects take a lot of drive and dedication, and they can certainly be done. Nonetheless, beginning with smaller projects can help you work your way up to these larger goals. However, going too big can cause burn out and or a sense of being overwhelmed by the scope of the project at hand.

Smaller projects build your capabilities by giving you a quicker sense of achievement and accomplishment, which will allow you the momentum to keep moving forward with your goals. To start small, you might invest half an hour each day to studying, meditating, practicing, exercising, or performing your goal.

Additionally, it’s important to consider that your larger goals are often made up of smaller goals. For example, if your larger goal is to gain a certain amount of muscle mass at the gym, your smaller goals might be individual workouts, setting up a sustainable workout routine, or mastering crucial forms of exercise.

Time Management

Time management takes on an important role in your personal development.

It’s easy to stall your success by using the excuse that you don’t have the time to learn something new. In some cases, you might be working at capacity and find this to be true. If you are working at capacity, adopting something new into our schedules would mean decreasing the quality with which we perform our other functions.

However, it’s also important to remember that time spent on self-development is not a waste. It’s time that you’re investing in yourself, which among the most important things that you can invest in. This time can help you to cultivate new skills, stronger social relationships, and long-term personal health.

Time management, particularly allocating the time to your goals, is one of the more difficult parts of personal development. Particularly when these personal goals may seem less mandatory than the other goals that may be foisted on you through your various responsibilities.

Moreover, development like this takes time, and there are few overnight indications of progress. It’s important to have patience with slow progress while also continuing to allocate time to it.

Learning to Self-Assess

When it comes to personal development, you will most often be your own primary judge of your improvement and performance. This can be a potential pitfall as well as a boon.

When we judge our own work, we may have the tendency to be overly harsh, seeing only the aspects where we need to improve. This perfectionistic trend can hinder and even stifle development.

There is another pitfall for the opposite temperament as well. Those who are too relaxed with their personal studies or who are not discerning enough will find it difficult to understand where they should improve.

Being able to critique your own work with the kind of compassion and clear sight that you might use on someone else’s work can take its own kind of practice and self-awareness.

This is why it’s very important to have a more structured way of measuring your progress and improvement, even when you are only truly measuring it against yourself. The most common structures by far include setting out goals and benchmarks, that you cross as you complete certain works.

It’s also helpful to have a clear measurement or assessment for progress to help make sure that you aren’t being too hard or easy on yourself. These measurements can take place at certain milestones that are part of your goals.

One way to improve the efficacy of your self-assessment is to build a community with others around some form of a mutually beneficial feedback system. This can help you get an outside perspective on your development. External critiques can be essential to understanding your own weak points, while they can also provide some much-needed affirmation for your struggles and progress.

Planning Personal Development

Some goals have a simple trajectory, that you can practice every day. Others, however, tend to require more complex skills. Planning is there to help you to target areas of development. This is also true the deeper you get into a goal, as you have the opportunity to specialize and personalize your skills and development.

Making a plan is not only important organizationally, but it also helps you build ideas and make your projects more coherent. This goes both ways, since, without plans, our ideas wouldn’t find a voice or means. Additionally, for those with busy schedules, planning can be a key part of seamlessly fitting personal goals into other responsibilities.

Remain Agile

Personal development often incorporates learning and skills development. This is a process that can have setbacks, personal hurdles, and any number of barriers to cross.

The path to development isn’t always clear. We don’t always know from the outset exactly what we want or how we will specialize. Over time, it’s common to alter what we want to learn from what we once thought we wanted.

This could mean switching from learning one coding language to another, switching from digital to analog photography, finding a favorite language to learn that you never expected for yourself, or going into a different style of art than you had previously studied.

The point is, we can only move forward by continuing to work and develop our skill sets. If we want our skill set to change direction, this isn’t a problem to fix. In most cases, it can be something useful and important to lean into. Remain agile when it comes to your goals, and allow yourself to cultivate and reshape them when they appear to be going in a direction that you don’t enjoy or want for yourself.

Remember that people change over the years and with our experiences. And this also means that our goals are likely to change and reflect these experiences as well. Sticking to a stale path that no longer reflects all that you have become may very well stifle the dreams you were trying to achieve in the first place. Be open to letting your goals grow and change with you. 

Find Your Community

A strong community can make up the difference between frustration with your goals and joyfully working through challenges. Speaking to others in your community will help you feel less isolated, as you tap into the experiences of others, and spend some time with others who might share your experiences.

For many people, initially finding your community is one of the largest challenges in personal development. This is why it can be helpful to attend conferences, spend some time at meetups, and not exclude yourself from groups.

At the same time, be aware of how your community is affecting you, your mental health, and your progress. We are often at our most vulnerable when we are developing, and this means that a toxic community can stymie our progress. Consider the impact of communities that don’t offer support or that cause you to feel too much negativity. It’s important to let yourself learn and develop without trying to force yourself into unhealthy social situations.

Form Habits

All good skills take time and practice to build, from language learning, coding, and developing social skills, to writing and comedy, or the visual arts. Even those with an inherent talent will find themselves falling short if they don’t nurture and spend time working on these skills. The best in every field are those with an array of experiences who have worked their way to that point.

Not only do you have to allow yourself to be a beginner when you start off those crucial habits, but it’s also a good idea to keep in mind the words of cartoonist Stephen McCranie, “The Master has failed more times than the beginner has even tried.” Forming habits is all about allowing yourself to fail often enough that you can begin to succeed. To accomplish goals, you need to work through being a beginner.

At the same time, habits can keep you stable throughout potentially turbulent phases of personal development. Some habits are merely auxiliary to your personal development, such as forming a morning routine or keeping a healthy circadian rhythm. Others require you to consistently practice your personal development, such as picking a time to practice or study every day, reading for thirty minutes a day, or sketching every day.

Keep a Record

Keeping a record of how your goals and habits are developing is a good way of tracking the changes to your lifestyle, as well as noting and targeting areas in your development where you’re finding some resistance.

For many, keeping records inspires reflection, which can allow you to view your progress for further motivation.

No matter how you use your journal or record, it can be a beneficial place for noting down ideas, progress, and quotations that inspire you. A journal can help keep yourself together, aid your introspection, and identify the ways that you’re growing now, as well as all the directions in which you’ve still yet to grow.

This journal or record could be a key to helping you organize your thoughts in a way that allows you to problem-solve your way to success. Putting your problems down on paper has a way of clarifying them, to help you become better able to understand the different sides and requirements of each problem.

Identifying and Altering Bad Habits and Fears

One large part of positive personal development is to identify your bad habits and begin the process of countering them with more positive habits.

We all have fears, and they are the number one thing that holds us back from accomplishing the more important goals in our lives. Put it this way: if it weren’t important to you, you wouldn’t be afraid of it. Some fears help you to perform and grow. Others, on the other hand, will hold you back every time. 

Additionally, your fears might be more common and relatable than you think. For example, one of the most common fears is public speaking and public disclosure, and it is eye-opening to consider that almost everyone has encountered some sort of public failure at one point in their life. Our first step is to identify that fear, realize that most of the population has experienced this problem, and then devise a plan to use that fear or failure as a learning tool to overcome it.

To begin this, it’s important to consider what your fears and negative habits are, and what drives you toward them. For example, many of the worst habits for personal development, such as procrastination, self-erasure, and other anxious habits, often spawn from a fear of failure. The fear of failure keeps many people from beginning. This blocks their full potential and keeps them from the powerful process of working toward a goal that would allow them to reap rewards.

On the other hand, there are some problems in our lives that give us more hidden benefits. We can’t get rid of all the bad. This means that there are sometimes some negative habits that we keep around to help us accomplish the bigger, harder things. It’s unrealistic to expect yourself to be positive and confident all the time. Ask yourself if you are deriving some kind of powerful motivation from this potentially negative habit.

Develop Resilience

Resilience is a psychological resource that offers us the ability to work through the tougher and more difficult times. While personal development isn’t magic and therefore can’t stop bad things from happening, the habits that you develop through it can help you to cope with these difficult times.

Nonetheless, these times shouldn’t stop you from working toward your personal development either. A bad spell shouldn’t be enough to stop you from working toward being the person that you want to be. For some of us and for some of our goals, it’s even more important to practice our spiritual, physical, intellectual, and creative development.

Essential Books to Read for Self-Improvement

Reading is one of the best ways to get yourself to start thinking about the bigger questions in your life, such as what you want, who you want to be, how you want to present yourself, what motivates you, and what it takes to get there.

Self-help books are particularly useful for offering food for thought, as well as tips and potential solutions to problems that you might face as you work toward your personal development goals.

1. Think and Grow Rich: The Original 1937 Edition by Napoleon Hill

“The starting point of all achievement is DESIRE. Keep this constantly in mind. Weak desire brings weak results, just as a small fire makes a small amount of heat.”

Don’t let the title mislead you. This monument of self-help books is about more than material gain and financial riches. This has long been a large part of using positive thinking for planning, making decisions, solving problems, and more.

2. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change by Stephen R. Covey

“But until a person can say deeply and honestly, “I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday,” that person cannot say, “I choose otherwise.” 

The seven habits outlined in this book offer a baseline for each individual to adapt to becoming their most effective self. In some cases, these habits and changes are simple. However, many of them may be fundamental lifestyle changes to help improve quality of life.

3. How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”

Another classic in the self-improvement field, this book helps you to fully understand some of the social aspects of business and life that you might already have an intuitive inkling about. The advice urges us to win influence by making the effort to be beneficial to others.

4. The Power of Positive Thinking by Dr. Norman Vincent Peale

“The way to happiness: Keep your heart free from hate, your mind from worry. Live simply, expect little, give much. Scatter sunshine, forget self, think of others. Try this for a week and you will be surprised.”

Even though many of us know how important our attitude can be to success, it can be difficult to alter our attitudes and embrace something like positive thinking on our own. This book illustrates the ways that positive thinking can put you in positions to make the most of successful turns in your life.

5. Whatcha Gonna Do With That Duck? and Other Provocations by Seth Godin

“Step one is to give the problem a name. Done. Step two is for anyone who sees themselves in this mirror to realize that you can always stop. You can always claim the career you deserve merely by refusing to walk down the same path as everyone else just because everyone else is already doing it.”

This book asks you to dig deep and ask yourself difficult questions in order to derive a perspective that sees opportunities and possibilities. By reading this book, you’re already forcing yourself to do the thinking work that will help you to expand and reflect.

6. The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene

“Do not accept the roles that society foists on you. Re-create yourself by forging a new identity, one that commands attention and never bores the audience. Be the master of your own image rather than letting others define it for you.”

Full of illustrative stories, this book can help to elucidate the invisible hierarchies that structure power relations throughout life. Having this understanding may not necessarily be a means of helping you to gain power, but it can help to protect you from pitfalls and abuses of power so that you recognize them when you see them.

7. The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

“It is not uncommon for people to spend their whole life waiting to start living.” 

This book focuses on mindfulness and its ability to inspire awareness, develop emotional intelligence, and embrace compassion for others. The ideal is to embrace the present moment in a way that allows individuals to detach from unhealthy thoughts and states of mind.

8. Daring Greatly: How the Courage to be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brene Brown

“Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen.” 

Daring Greatly asks readers to tap into a sense of vulnerability to embrace their self-worth. This allows individuals to develop relationships through genuine compassion. Having both compassion for others and for ourselves helps to keep us from closing down during the tougher times.

9. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain

“The secret to life is to put yourself in the right lighting. For some, it’s a Broadway spotlight; for others, a lamplit desk. Use your natural powers — of persistence, concentration, and insight — to do work you love and work that matters. Solve problems. make art, think deeply.” 

Quiet is a manifesto of the inner strength that individuals can develop on their own. It’s a powerful book for anyone who considers themselves to be an introvert with great advice for introverts and extroverts alike.

Essential Podcasts for Personal Development

• The Lavendaire Lifestyle – This podcast offers tips for personal development and creating the life that you want to live. Topics include lifestyle and relationship advice, life coaching, minimalism and tidying, and cultivating a strong personal relationship with yourself.
• The Terri Cole Show – The Terri Cole Show focuses on finding purpose in a busy life with a good dose of motivation and psychology. This podcast speaks to embracing the inevitably of imperfections and developing self-nurturing habits.
• The Life Coach School Podcast – This podcast is indispensable for covering all the aspects of personal development, motivation, personal psychology, financial, and career development. Through it, you can learn to set goals, stop procrastinating, find happiness, and make your life your own.
• The Brendon Show – This podcast brings positive, high-performance professionalism into your personal development and everyday life. This is a career and profession-driven podcast that offers a heavy dose of motivation and a call to action.
• 10% Happier – Ten Percent Happier is a podcast about meditation, mental and emotional development, and life in general. It covers how to have both ambition and enlightenment.

Conclusion

As much as personal development is an individual pursuit, there are many helpful resources to get you started in the right direction, spur on your motivation, organize your goals, form communities and meaningful relationships, and bring about the life that you envision for yourself.

25 Grooming Tips For Men By Women

Gentlemen, are you interested in doing all that you can to attract a partner?  Do you sometimes think that your friends have more luck with the opposite sex than you do?  There are certain things that you might have no immediate control over like your salary or looks. However, there are a significant number of factors that are within your control right now, which when asked, women named as very important.  Here are the top 25 grooming tips suggested by women for men…

1) Remember hygiene, and don’t let it lapse even for one day.  Not every couple gets together by one approaching the other or by a prearranged introduction.  Sometimes people are thrust together by unexpected events.  Maybe you are forced to sit together in a restaurant, or maybe you’re each hanging out with friends who know each other.  The important thing is, if you have a “brew on” or generally look unkempt for any reason, other than you are in the middle of jog or you just finished playing a basketball game, then you might miss out on an opportunity. People are judged harshly if their hygiene isn’t good and it is almost impossible to get a second chance.  After that first meeting, the woman could very well be referring to you as “Stinky” in her mind.

2) Facial hair needs to look like you cared enough to put some thought into it.  No, you don’t have to be clean shaven.  No you don’t have to have a thick hipster facial beard.  The thing is, no matter what you sport on your face, make it look purposeful.  Got a beard? Manage it.  Got five o’clock shadow?  Manage it.  Clean shaven?  Shave at least every other day and don’t miss spots.  Got a neck beard?  Shave it.  Kill it.  Stop it. Neck beards never look good.

3) Take care of your kicks and only wear them when they’re clean.  You don’t have to wear $200 shoes everywhere you go, you can wear $50 shoes if you want, but take care of them so they look good.  What ladies look for is how you maintain your things.  Shoes are one of the easiest and quickest things to look at and judge, and you’re being judged by the appearance of your shoes.  Wearing croc sandals does not make you quirky; it makes you look lazy and lame.  Wait until you hook her before you wear your 10 year old boat shoes or bright green crocs.  In the meantime, keep the leather clean and keep your laces tied and clean too.

Need some new socks to go with your new shoes – then check out the trendiest socks around, stance socks the uncommon thread.

4) Keep a reasonable haircut and take care of your hair.  If you can afford to go to a stylist, go there and ask the best way to take care of your particular cut.  No matter where your hair is cut, get it cut in a way that you can manage it.  Some men don’t mind taking time to fix their hair each morning.  If you do mind, then get a simple haircut and maintain it.  If you choose to keep your hair a bit longer, and it requires some styling invest in a quality hair dryer.

5) Sleep.  Circles under your eyes, red eyes, and a general sallow complexion are not unusual for people who are deprived of sleep.  No one thinks those looks are good.  Get your seven to nine hours and you’ll have more energy and you’ll look better too.

6) Smelling good is more than taking a shower and using deodorant (although that should happen at least once a day) you should also add some sort of fragrance.  The fragrance should not be such a strong scent that people are looking at you cockeyed from 10 feet away, but if you find yourself within two or feet of a woman, you want to pique her interest with a manly, welcoming smell.

7) Take care of your teeth and your breath.  Brush your teeth, and if you drink coffee, take a mint afterward.  Better yet try an at home teeth whitening kit.  You want white teeth, and you want your breath to smell good.  There are genetic or uncontrollable problems that can keep a yellowish film on your teeth.  Usually dentists can help with those problems, all you have to do is ask. If you want a full guide for having excellent teeth, check out our article and infographic on flossing and flossing alternatives.

8) Don’t over accessorize your wardrobe.  If you choose to wear a necklace of some sort, don’t make it obvious from far—understated is good, bold and in your face is bad.  If you have something on the end of the chain, it should say something about you.  It should be a cross, or a star, or something that reminds you of Mom and apple pie.  You can also wear a simple watch, and if you must, you can wear one ring that has some sort of significance to you.  A pinky ring is not allowable unless you’re a hitman for the mafia.

9) Body hair can be an issue—darn the bad luck of genetics.  Get rid of the neck beard, but also consider ridding yourself of the back and shoulder blanket – you can use a body groomer for this.  How much is too much neck and back hair?  If it looks like you’re wearing a muff under your shirt with hair sticking up through the back of your shirt that is too much body hair.  Much like many other things, you can let the back hair grow after she’s in love with you.

10) Take care of your lips.  Have you ever seen someone who is recovering from a terrible cold or from a fever, and their lips are all cracked and maybe even bleeding?  Gross, right?  Take care of your lips.  Avoid the cracked, gross lips. If you spend a lot of time outside in the wind and sun, invest in a Chap Stick.

11) Take care of your hands. It might feel manly to have callouses from the weight bar, or from swinging a hammer, but when you touch a lady, you don’t want her to pull back because your hands feel like sandpaper and your nails look like half a farm is under them.  Get a nail brush, take care of your cuticles, and put a lotion on your mitts if need be.  Callouses will still be there to impress her, but she’ll appreciate softer hands when you touch her.

12) Take care of your eyebrows.  Like many things on this list, a monobrow, or a caterpillar brow might seem picky and things that God and genetics have made, but you have one chance to make a first impression.  If you’re a seven footer in the NBA with a $20 million a year salary, you can have a monobrow, if you’re not, then keep them plucked and separated.

13) Wear clothing that fits you like you’re a man.  If you’re older than 14, your clothes should fit you, not look like you’re hoping to grow into them someday.  Clothes that are baggy make you look like you don’t care how you look.  Buy clothes that fit your form and own it with confidence and kindness.  Baggy clothes look sloppy and don’t fool anyone.

14) I can’t believe this is something I have to say, but, take care of the earwax.  I mean, gross.  If you have earwax coming out of the ear canal, it is time to get it out of there.

15) Overdress, don’t underdress, just don’t overdress by a lot.  In other words, if you work in an office and most guys wear polos, then you can either wear a polo or a button down shirt.  If most men wear button downs, then wear a tie.  You don’t want to get attention by being the guy who is just a little sloppier than he needs to be.

16) When you think about how you dress, especially if you’re going on a date, psychologists suggest that women are receptive to men who wear red.  Who knows?  I always thought I preferred yellow, but maybe when I meet someone new, red really does look good.

17) Man-scaping can be a nice thing.  In 2016, more and more men seem to think that women should take care of themselves south of the border; we feel the same way about men.  Keep yourselves clean down there, and every so often, give yourself a little trim (a body groomer will come in handy).  It doesn’t take long, and we’ll appreciate the effort.

18) Use a facial scrub.  Some men cannot help but have blackheads and zits from time to time.  Heck, it happens to women too.  The difference is that women are often permitted by society to find something to keep our faces clean and free of oil.  Now men are able to find the same kinds of products, and they can either be found online or in most drugstores.  Take some time and scrub your face. Not only will it decrease black heads and zits, it will also make your skin look fresher and renewed.

19) If your wardrobe is generally an old comfortable t-shirt when you’re not at work, and then consider changing it.  You can still wear a polo shirt or a button down shirt and not look like you’re dressed up with nowhere to go.  For many women, seeing a man wearing an old concert shirt to the grocery store makes that man invisible.  While you’re at it, get rid of your 15 year old jeans that came with holes in the knees. Time moves on.  So should your wardrobe.

20) Don’t try to hide your thinning hair.  It may be true that many women would prefer a man with thick hair, but heck, you would prefer to have thick hair.  However, if you’re losing it, just style your hair in a way that lets you own that your body is changing.  Thickening shampoos can give you volume, and products that keep it in place without clumping makes your hair look natural and good.  Do. Not. Wear. A. Mullet.  More hair in the back won’t make your hair look better on your head where it is thinning.

21) Look at your nose and your ears.  Just look straight at the mirror.  Do you see hair coming from those orifices?  If you do, trim the hair.  It doesn’t really matter what implement you use, but find something that you will be safe using.  You do not want to trade hair coming out your nose for a large, red scar from the time you got careless with the sharp scissors when you were trimming that hair.

22) Hair over the ears is so 1970s.  It’s amazing that many barbers just let this look continue even when the men who had this style originally are retired grandpas now.  If you have hair over your ears, leave it if it is covering a scar that makes you feel self-conscious, otherwise, have it cut.  Have it cut now.

23) Look at your neck.  For many men, neck hair (not the neck beard which is just yuck) grows faster than head hair, or at least thicker, and neck hair looks bad.  A thick thatch of neck hair makes the rest of your appearance look sloppy.

24) Do your feet stink?  If the answer is, duh, then you need to make some changes.  Feet get a bad rap and often people think all feet stink.  After all, they are trapped in both socks and shoes all day long.  But, if you take the time to scrub and exfoliate them so that dead skin cells are removed, they won’t stink—at least they won’t smell as bad.  That is not to suggest that they will smell like daisies once you have finished your run or basketball game, but they won’t gag you (or a lady admirer either).

25) Don’t wear clothes twice without washing them.  Remember a couple of years ago people said they went years without washing their blue jeans?  I’m thinking those people did not have a loved one, because I don’t think a normal person could wear their jeans that many times without the jeans stinking.  Don’t try that at home.  Wash your clothes just like you wash your body.

Fair or not, we judge you initially not by what is in your brain and heart, but how you look.  You don’t have to look like a movie star, but you need to look as though you have spent time making an attempt to look good and smell good.  Prove that you don’t take us for granted and you may be surprised that things will go your way.

Now that you have actioned each of these short term items you can start to look at longer term tasks; such as getting in shape by starting a body building program, improving your mind by reading more or doing an educational course, and even working on a strategy to improve your career.  Go get them tiger!